Welcome to Friday FishWrap™, your weekly email filled with this week’s efforts from the staff of The Global Exclaimer.
From The Theological Armory
A man named Stephen Kent asked a question in that part of the Substack App where random stuff just shows up (you know the section in the menu bar that looks like Home Plate on a baseball diamond), and it forced art out of me. Well, an attempt anyway.
How Did Christianity "Fulfill" Pagan Myth?
SUBSTACK NATION (GLOB)—A man named Stephen Kent asked a question in that part of the Substack App where random stuff just shows up (you know the section in the menu bar that looks like Home Plate on a baseball diamond), and it forced art out of me. Well, an attempt anyway.
Beauregard Wants to Know
What’s up with chia seeds?
From The Slime To The Ridiculous
CARROLLTON, Texas (GLOB)—Hey Chad, What's up with Chia seeds? And why do you keep recommending I put them in or on everything? I'm half expecting you to recommend chia seed enemas for holistic cleansing. Besides, it looks like ants are crawling all over my peanut butter smeared all natural toast made from 7 sprouted grains.
Elon Flees Substack
Earlier, I had reported that Kekius Maximus Musk had followed me. It appears the klieg lights of Substack notoriety were too much. Or maybe he was just checking out his X née Twitter rival Notes.
If It’s Trending, Should You Care?
Paddy Keyk says, “No.”
Fake Virality
CARROLLTON, TX - CRADLE OF CIVILIZATION (GLOB)—Remember how immigrants were eating pets in Springfield, Ohio? If you are thinking, “Oh yeah. Whatever happened with that?” then you have survived a FOG event (Fleeting Overhyped Gossip).
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These are excellent reads to begin a weekend. Thank you having such encouraging content that values truth over hype.